Suffering

The last few months have been - well - interesting . Events unexpected have happened, life that seemed moving along predictable lines has taken a sudden turn. Uncertainty is in the air. Through all this the grace has shone consistently (though only visible to me when i was aware) .

How else could one explain sitting outside the hospital ICU as sick-loved-one was wheeled in a few months ago, wistfully thinking "Guruji, have you abandoned me" only to have someone walk past the NEXT minute with a book by Guruji in his hand and answering his friend's questions about the book with a "oh this is sri sri ravishankar guruji's book" .

How else could one explain returning on Gurupoornima night after attending a rocking satsang at Sanghvi Pune, starting pranayam, hearing a loud thud from the bathroom, running there and finding that sick-loved-one had fallen atop another-loved-one in a heap after slipping and discovering that neither of them was hurt one bit.

Or pondering how to get sick-loved-one to the testing center for a blood test when she could hardly get off the bed and then calling the test center who offer to send their person home.

Or not having been employed for the last 1 year and yet being able to afford the expenses that seem to keep piling up like crazy.

Or...the list is endless.

Though the heart feels the gratitude and the grace, the suffering, both physical and mental continue at times. Caring for a loved one is something I always wanted to do and now is my chance, but I'll admit - its not easy. It can be physically exhausting at times, especially over a prolonged period. One has to give up pretty much everything one is used to doing be it working, studying, coding, recreational activities, exercise...you name it. Mentally the agony of watching a loved one suffer is hard enough. The mind jumps to the future and wonders - How long will this suffering continue ?

I was analyzing the reasons for this agony when I came across the following knowledge point.

Suffering is the product of limited knowledge - Sri Sri

I also remembered that the 2 points that kept coming up were the Part I knowledge points :

• Accept the situation as it is
• The present moment is inevitable
  

It struck me that my problem was just this. I wasn't accepting that this seemingly imperfect situation was just what the universe wanted me to face right now. Also if I stopped wondering about when this would all end, maybe life would not be so tough ! Right now the awareness is strong but I am unable to apply these points at all times. Help me Guruji !

Jai Gurudev,